“Rock Bottom Rock Bottom Rock Bottom by the champion. One, two….oh my god! Lesnar kicked out of the Rock Bottom! I cant believe it. Look at the look of Rock…perplexed. I think he’s trying to go for another one…wait, a bone crunching spine buster by Lesnar! But the Rock’s back up, I think Lesnar’s hurt. Spine Buster by the Rock….it’s time for the people’s elbow…Oh my God! Just as he’s going for it Lesnar gets up and delivers a clothesline..what a hit! It almost took Rock out of his boots…It’s F5 time…one two three…Lesnar is the youngest Undisputed WWE Champion!”
Summerslam 2012: Main Event Triple H vs Brock Lesnar at Staples Center, Los Angeles.
“Lesnar’s stalking Triple H. Referee’s letting them fight. And now Lesnar with Triple H up high, an F5! It’s over. The Beast hooks the leg. One, two, the game kicks out! What! Lesnar’s shocked. Heyman can’t believe it. Oh look, he’s going for it again, he’s going for the Kimura lock again. He’s got it locked! You need to stop the match ref, don’t let him break the arm. Triple H with kicks to the kidneys has managed to escape the lock. What a fight…Triple H going for the pedigree again. Can he move this big body over for the cover….no he can’t…Lesnar’s locked the Kimura again! Triple H with nowhere to go. Hunter’s trying to fight, he’s trying to survive. He’s tapped he’s tapped! Triple H taps out!”
Summerslam 2013: CM Punk vs Brock Lesnar at Staples Center, Los Angeles.
“Heyman’s getting involved again. Punk with Anaconda Vice on Heyman and he’s tapping….look look look Lesnar with a chair! He attacks Punk with the chair three times. There’s no stopping this beast! Punk has been punished. And now Lesnar with Punk up high, oh right on the chair. F5 on the chair! Cover by Lesnar…one, two, three! Brock Lesnar has beaten CM Punk.”
“Undertaker sits up again. Two incredible athletes fighting for their place in history. Undertaker signals it’s over. Maybe he’s not human. Brock Lesnar countered….Lesnar countered..He’s got Undertaker up going for a triple. A third F5! Brock Lesnar into the cover…one…two…three! The streak is over!”
Summerslam 2014: Main Event WWE World Heavyweight Championship John Cena (c) vs Brock Lesnar at Staples Center, Los Angeles.
“God…another German. This is an awful dilemma for referee Charles Robinson to be in. Cena’s not going to quit. It’s a waste of time. Cena Cena look at this! Going for the STF. Desperation move by Cena! Cena has found a way to make Lesnar tap out. I told you to not give up on John Cena. He’s got it locked in, what’s Lesnar going to do. Lesnar’s got nowhere to go he’s in the middle of the ring. He’s going to tap! Oh man! Look at Lesnar! Oh my God! Lesnar reversing the hold and now hammering away at Cena. What a specimen! Oh my God Lesnar’s got Cena up high and F5! One, Two Three! Lesnar has won the WWE World Heavyweight Championship in convincing fashion!”
It’s not often that I dedicate a full column to one man. But that time has arrived where my hand is forced out of sheer astonishment and marvel. If you had seen the main event of Summerslam you would know exactly what I’m talking about!
In over ten years of my life devoured to watching Sports Entertainment, I have never seen a main event that was dominated by one man and that same man emerging victorious! If you read the book of Professional Wrestling booking, this type of match would always end in the underdog taking the beating, and finally forging a comeback to pin the heel who has delivered the beating. Those rule books went out of the window last Sunday. And to my amazement!
That’s all because of one man, one man who has a huge sword painted across his chest! One man who you wouldn’t want to meet eye-to-eye. One man that’s a legitimate Beast. One man who bangs the hottest wife at home, Sable. One man that’s named Brock Lesnar!
I knew that Lesnar was going to win the Championship. That much was certain to me. But the path he took to destroy John Cena, the face of the WWE, left me speechless. And i’m sure i’m not the only one. The certainty in my eyes that Lesnar would leave Summerslam the Champion goes back to what I predicted when he broke The Undertaker’s WrestleMania streak. There was no way WWE would do that just to provide shock value.
They had a well-laid plan. With Undertaker’s approval proof-printed, Lesnar was going to dominate WWE until someone worthy of the status to beat him would come along. The list of achievements renders you searching for words. NCAA Champion, WWE Undisputed Champion, King of The Ring, UFC Champion. This is a man who’s done it all and carries a mystique with him that I think we would never see of a Professional Wrestler again when he hangs up the boots. Watch any other WWE match and a Lesnar’s match and you would track the world of difference, the stark contrast.
This Beast generates that intensity, that jaw-dropping atmosphere inside an arena and the entitlement to believe that what you are seeing is truly a fight. In an environment where WWE is constantly slandered for its pre-determined nature by petty people who wouldn’t know the hardships the wrestlers endure to put on a show or the injury risks they pile up on themselves if something goes wrong, Lesnar is Gold!
He’s the master at bringing that aura and whoever that finally beats him for the title will be on a pedestal that should be close to immortal. If you still had doubts, check Steve Austin’s tweet. He called Brock, The Frankenstein and that amounts to more than any eulogies that I can write of Lesnar.
I have to give kudos to WWE as well as John Cena. Make no mistake, I was delighted to see Cena get his ass kicked left right and center. But what the ground truth of it is, he understands the business. Show me one man who has been the face of the WWE that would agree to a booking of such a beatdown and I will show you a liar. No one would have concurred to that.
Cena being the loyal servant agreed without letting his ego get in front and for that I have to praise him. Credit where it’s due. And on Vince’s part, it’s wonderful that he’s realized the anomaly, which is the straight up Beast in the pure sense of the world, contracted to him. Paired with Paul Heyman, it’s the closest you can get to perfection.
Now execute this plan comprehensively and bring back the days when a main title change meant the world will be talking about it definitively. If the execution so far is any indication, they are well on their way. And I hope they don’t sign Brock to a contract where he will appear at every Monday Night Raw. Make his appearances limited so that when he does come through that curtain, it would be a billboard sighting.
I’m not just saying this because Brock Lesnar is my favourite wrestler after Chris Jericho. I’m saying this because that’s what’s best for business.
Do not have him defend the title at every pay-per-view because 1) it takes away the specialness of it and 2) with the build up he has been given, there’s no challengers that is equipped to challenge him let alone beat him. Don’t mess this up WWE. After Night Of Champions, let him only defend at Survivor Series and Royal Rumble before WrestleMania.
And finally a warning to all and sundry who can’t stand Brock! Run! Stop watching! Because dare I say it, no one will beat him for the title for atleast two years. Yes, I said it!
Rumours are that either The Rock or Roman Reigns will face Lesnar at WrestleMania XXXI at California but if WWE are to let either of them beat Lesnar that would be a big mistake. I want (or I predict whatever, believing the greater sense will prevail) Daniel Bryan to win the Royal Rumble and face Lesnar at Maina in a losing effort. If not , a returning CM Punk to win the Rumble and square off against Lesnar.
Because having The Rock beat Lesnar has no value for the future of the WWE. It has to be someone who is capable of taking the company to the next generation. Reigns could be that one but he is nowhere near ready to take up that mantle as yet and next April is too soon for his progression.
Let Lesnar have the title until WrestleMania XXXII in 2016 and withstanding someone (could be Reigns, Cesaro or even Bray Wyatt) is build up to the level where fans can truly believe that superstar can legitimately defeat Lesnar, then pull the trigger. By that time, Lesnar would eclipse Punk’s reign as the longest reigning champion since the new millennium and that’s an accolade that’s deserving of the accomplishments that has befallen to him in the past few months.
16 German suplexes Ladies and Gentlemen! And if you thought you had seen all from Lesnar, you are in for a rude shock. Because you had just seen the start of what this man is capable of. I bet my house on it.
All Hail The Conqueror. Here Comes The Pain. The Beast Incarnate is the greatest thing to have happened to our much-maligned Sport. He will take Professional Wrestling back to the pop culture and again and I’m one happy camper because of it.